I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
