if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
