I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
