did you get engaged???
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Too much gin, very little bucket
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I just found puke in my bra..
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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