he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
