Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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