maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
