this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
ugly people sure do ruin things
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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