So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
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