TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
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