I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
