Plan B is the new Plan A
zippers are such a cool invention
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
