You work out of a Hotel?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
