He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
