He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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