At least make sure they are 18
Why
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize