I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
love makes seman taste better
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
