youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
