Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
