i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
