He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
