i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I just want nice things and good sex
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
