bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize