Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize