Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
