It's Friday. Sex?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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