Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
