bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
