ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
