well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
