big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I need to calm my uterus...
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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