we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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