this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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