if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
