Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Randomize
