I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
