Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
