I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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