i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
