I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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