I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
