i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
