Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
