Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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