I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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