You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize