Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
