I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Randomize
