I wannas sexs uuuuu
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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