So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
