Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
